Using your intuition to attract a man

By Christian Carter, Loveromancerelationship.com

Have you ever felt “magic” with a man?

Where the connection and chemistry you and he share is so strong that something inside tells you that it’s something special and real?

You both can’t stop thinking about each other and your lives start to “naturally” fall into sync.

So let me ask you…

Have you ever noticed that when you’re really connected with a man that you both can actually start to feel and experience what each other are going through?

It’s like your minds are connected somehow.

Well, have you ever thought about what that “magic” connection that you have is, and how it works?

Or how you could use it more to improve your relationship?

Good. You and I are in sync too.

Now, let’s get into using the incredible and unique power of using your own INTUITION to connect with a man on a deeper level and build the level of intimacy and attraction he feels with you…

Tell me if any of the following seem strangely familiar to you:

-He starts acting restless and talking about how he isn’t really ready to “settle down” and wants his “freedom”

-He tells you that he didn’t see things getting “serious” so fast

-He doesn’t make an effort to connect with you, give you praise or attention, and stops sharing any personal thoughts or feelings

-He stops making you a priority. He wants to spend all of his time with friends or other people and doesn’t value time together anymore

-He never initiates anymore. He isn’t as physically excited and into you as he was at first

-He starts flirting, talking to or even hanging out with other women

Recognize any of these?

Ouch, right?

So what in the world can you do about it when a man is acting so withdrawn and closed off like in these situations above?

Well, tell me…

Did you ever sense any of these things coming before they happened, or when they started, but you didn’t have any “proof”?

Fascinating how that works.

What’s going on here?

Well, what’s happening centers around an important idea I want you to understand-

That you instinctively know more about what’s going on in the world around you than you or your conscious mind fully recognizes.

So here’s the deal…

You ALREADY HAVE a magical ability inside you that comes up for you every once in a while.

So all you have to do is learn how to consciously tune into it.

This “magic” is what we also refer to sometimes as INTUITION.

So how does it work and what is it?

In short, intuition is something that comes “pre-wired” in your brain.

The way your conscious and subconscious mind is hooked up to the rest of your complex body systems and senses make it possible.

So the good news is that this ability is there for you anytime you want to use it.

But the bad news is that you have to take time to fully tune into it and recognize your ability.

It a kind of “practice”.

Music is a good way to explain it.

You can’t just pick up an instrument and start playing, right?

But once you start to become more aware of the instrument, the music and how to play, things start to naturally fall into place.

And soon sounds, melodies and rhythms just start to flow out of you in the moment.

Like they appear out of thin air, and nothing could feel more natural.

And your mind is able to process all the information coming at it that used to overload it.

But now it can take it all in and use it to actually ANTICIPATE what’s next.

Well, this is EXACTLY what this magical ability of yours called intuition is like.

Your mind is constantly picking up on information from your environment, even when you’re not really conscious of it.

And all that information is being “processed” over and over to try and calculate the risk, danger, and expectations from your environment to try to find a way towards the outcome you want.

The long and short of dirty words

BY MISTY HARRIS, POSTMEDIA NEWS

Canadians thinking of talking dirty during sex might want to reconsider, given a new study’s discovery that prurient language causes people to underestimate how long something lasts.

When researchers displayed taboo sexual words on a computer screen, onlookers consistently misjudged the amount of time that had passed — an effect attributed to the shocking language’s capacity to stop them dead in their tracks. Time was perceived by participants to have flown by because their minds were focused on the explicit words as opposed to the ticking of their internal clocks. 

“The idea is that each word so grabs your attention that you lose track of time — a bit like being engrossed in a book,” says study author Jason Tipples, a psychologist at The University of Hull in the U.K. “And, because attention is being detracted from the process of counting time, if you ask people to look at the clock afterward, they’ll say, ‘Where has all the time gone?'”

Or, bringing it back to the bedroom, “It’s over already?”

Tipples, whose study is published in the journal Psychonomic Bulletin & Review, trained participants to recognize short and long intervals of time. Nevertheless, when put through the experiments, they consistently underestimated how much time a taboo word was displayed on screen (their choices being, simply, “short” or “long”).

The study dovetails with research by Canada’s Anthony Chaston, who found that occupying people with a mentally taxing task causes them to underestimate how much time has passed. The more difficult the task becomes, the shorter the participants’ judgments of time.

But he hastens to add that for tasks that span longer intervals, the opposite effect can occur.

“The explanation is that it’s no longer based on the internal timer; it’s based on a memory model,” says Chaston, associate professor of psychology at Mount Royal University in Calgary. “The more stuff you can remember doing, the longer you think it took.”

There are, of course, contexts in which short spans can nonetheless lead to overestimations of time — a topic explored by the U.K.’s Tipples in a forthcoming study for the journal Emotion.

 

In this case, the idea is that something that amplifies people’s awareness of their ticking internal clock — fear or revulsion, for example — will cause them to count more “units of time” than have actually passed.

“You know how in car crashes, people say it was as if time stood still? Well, you get that same effect with highly (psychologically) arousing images,” says Tipples. “If you show someone a really angry face and ask them to judge whether they saw it for a short interval or a long interval, they’ll usually say long, overestimating the amount of time that had passed because they wanted the face to go away.”

This is the reason why boredom, which causes people to dwell on every minute, creates a feeling that an eternity has passed even though very little time has gone by. Or, rather, why a watched pot never seems to boil.

Ira Hyman, a cognitive psychologist familiar with these types of studies, says the bottom line is that we can’t trust our biological clocks.

“The big take-away message is that time perception is based on the nature of the event,” observes Hyman, a professor at Western Washington University. “The more interesting the event, the less you’re aware of it and the faster time seems to fly by.”

Something to keep in mind, he says, the next time your partner complains that sex didn’t last very long. Clearly, it was just too captivating to be timed.

 

Sex lab holds key to knee orgasms and the cheating vaccine

Nancy J. White, Living Reporter, thestar.com

From the alluring smell of pumpkin pie to a vaccine for cheaters, scientists have turned up some useful as well as wacky tidbits about sexuality.

For her book, Secrets from the Sex Lab, author Judy Dutton gathered researchers’ findings on what’s going on chemically, biologically and neurologically.

Dutton, 37, spoke to the Star about scientific flirting, knee orgasms, and what to name — or not name — your baby.

 Q: The biggest mystery is sexual chemistry. What is it?

Sexual chemistry is ruled by factors we have little control over or little awareness about. For example, the way someone smells can make or break how much chemistry you have. Someone may seem all wrong but the smell is right and you’re smitten and you don’t understand why. It has to do with the major histocompatibility complex, a sequence of genes involved in the immune system. If someone smells good, it indicates that your immune systems are compatible and you’ll have strong healthy offspring. This isn’t something we think about consciously. It’s going on under the surface.

Q: What particular smells are turn-ons?

Scientists actually hooked up measuring devices to people’s genitals to measure blood flow and then put different smells in front of them until they found winning combinations. An interesting day at work.

They found that men are attracted to the smell of pumpkin pie mixed with lavender. That smell increased genital blood flow by 40 per cent. For women, the smell of cucumber mixed with the candy Good & Plenty increased vaginal blood flow by 14 per cent.

They also found that a spicy floral scent made women appear about twelve pounds lighter to men.

Q: You say that even a person’s name may affect chemistry. Ben and Julie are hot. Luke and Anne are not. Why?

A researcher put pictures up on the website hotornot.com and then changed the names to see the effect. For men, names with a, e and i sounds, such as Matt or Mike, were rated as hot. For women, it was o and u sounds, like Lola or Judy. The sound of the vowels seem to make an impact on how attractive we find someone.

Q: Besides smearing yourself with pumpkin or cucumber, what other flirting tips does science offer?

For women, one technique is to schedule dates around when she’s ovulating. Studies show that men find women more attractive at that time than any other point in the month. We don’t know exactly why — smell, looks — but they’re more appealing.

For men, when they go out on the prowl, instead of bringing a wingman with them, they should bring a wingwoman, a female friend. The reason is what scientists call mate choice copying. Women are more attracted to men who are already receiving female attention. The thinking is that this guy has to have something that makes the other woman interested.

Q: You write about erogenous zones. But really, nose and knee orgasms?

A lot of people think it’s an urban legend, but scientists have documented them, even ear-gasms and eyebrow-gasms. Certain people are just wired that way. It’s not as if everyone can have a nose orgasm. I tried but didn’t get far.

If someone is highly aroused by traditional means, sometimes a little caress on a particular part of the body will do it. You never know until you’ve tried.

Q: A woman has an A spot and a U spot?

Yeah. The anterior fornix erogenous zone, or A spot, was discovered by a sexologist in Malaysia. It’s located a little deeper than the G spot. It can cause orgasm in under two minutes, according to a study. The U spot is extra sensitive tissue surrounding the urethral opening.

Q: You say that an MRI scan of your brain can reveal if you’re in love or in lust. How does that work?

It’s not widely available, yet. For a study, scientists put people in MRI machines and showed them photos of someone they were in love with and then random pictures of attractive people. When the subjects looked at the loved ones, certain areas of the brain lit up. When they saw the random attractive people, other areas lit up. It’s essentially looking into the brain to see if it’s true love. It’s better than a fortune teller.

Q: Can scientists predict who will cheat?

To a certain extent. First, there’s a genetic component. Scientists have found certain genes that make people more prone to cheating, but it’s not a done deal. I wouldn’t get my partner genetically tested and then toss him if he had the cheating gene. I’d just keep an eye on him.

Scientists developed a cheating vaccine that works on rodents. Meadow voles are extremely promiscuous. By injecting them with the vaccine they turned monogamous. A cheating vaccine for humans won’t be available any time soon. There are lots of moral quandaries.

Q: Can brain scans be used to detect cheaters?

There’s a company in California called No Lie MRI where you can bring your partner, but it’s expensive. While in the magnetic resonance imaging machine, the partner is shown a photo of the beloved and answers questions. From the scans, you can tell if the person is cheating by areas of the brain that light up. When a lie is involved, many areas of the brain are activated. Most who get the scan are faithful. Those who aren’t tend to run away or cave at the last minute. It’s very effective in ferreting out cheaters even before they get there.

Q: Will science ever answer all the secrets of sex?

It’s definitely answered a lot of things that make people anxious. That’s what I found so hopeful. For example, men worry about penis size but scientists have proven that it doesn’t matter. Women can stop stressing about how they look naked. Researchers found that men spend most of the time looking at the woman’s face. But there will always be more questions.

Q: In your research, what most surprised you?

I was definitely surprised to learn that in addition to heterosexuals, homosexuals, bisexuals and transsexuals, there’s another orientation: asexuals, who are attracted to no one. Scientists estimate that one in 100 people are asexuals. There’s a support group complete with t-shirts and catchy slogans, such as “A-Pride,” and “Asexuality is not just for amoebas anymore.” Perhaps one day they will have their own bars to avoid getting hassled.

Q: You mentioned you have an infant daughter. Did you give her a hot name?

Oh my God. I don’t think I even thought of it. Her name is Indiana. That’s not in the hot category, no “o” or “u” sounds. She’ll have that working against her. But maybe that’s a good thing. Maybe subconsciously I wanted to keep her home and out of trouble.